Today I want to talk about an aspect of life that often holds us back in business and in life – our mental health.
It is a subject which has been bought more out into the open this year than ever before, due to the measures taken in response to the Coronavirus. It has certainly been a very challenging year for everyone but more so for anyone who was already having issues with their mental health!
Everyone who is engaged in the miracle of life can be subjected to negative mental health at any time in their life. Mostly we will just have days when we really can’t be bothered to engage at all, these are perfectly normal. No-one is really happy all the time! Many of life’s events can trigger a bout of depression that can be anything from just feeling rubbish for a few days to more serious conditions which require medication or therapy.
As many triggers as there are, there are also many ways to deal with any incidents. I prefer to use natural methods rather than anti-depressant drugs and I do believe that these can work alongside each other, but the biggest problem we face when working through recovery is that it takes time to change your mental state, which is the key to full recovery.
Very often, a long walk in nature is enough to restore your equilibrium. We need to spend time in nature because we are natural beings and need to be connected to nature. One of the problems we have today is that we have been encouraged to become disconnected from nature and believe that all our electronic devices can give us everything we need. This is not true and increasingly many people are beginning to realise this and limit their exposure, especially to social media which can be extremely negative and certainly contributes to the mental health issues we now see so often in society.
Sadly, many people still feel that admitting to having issues with their Mental health is extremely difficult and they will still try to hide away from the issue but it will not go away by its self. This is happening even though the subject is being spoken about more openly now.
Many people struggle with life as a result of learned negative behaviours from their past.
How many of us have been told that we will never make anything of ourselves or that no-one wants to hear what we have to say or similar such rubbish?
It's usually done by people who on some level feel inferior (although they're often not aware of this or would admit it anyway!). They feel they have to make others feel as bad as they do. People do judge the actions of others, even though we know they should not do so because they have not lived your life, they have no idea of the challenges you have faced and have no right to criticise your opinions and increasingly, it seems these days that everyone feels entitled to express their opinion, whether it is valid or requested and often, if we respond to that negativity, they then get upset & unpleasant as they themselves can’t take criticism!
The words that are spoken or written can be very damaging, especially when the person being attacked is already struggling.
We cannot change the way others are, but we can and must take responsibility for how we allow those unkind & untrue words to affect us.
Living with this sort of negativity has an accumulated impact when we add in all the other negativity from other people we come into contact with and is very often the root cause of conditions like depression, anxiety and the stresses associated with them.
The irony is that although we may have been held back by this in our lives, we have usually still managed to achieve several successes. A happy marriage, having children, exam and degree success and many similar achievements are all successes in our lives but we are not encouraged to celebrate them for long. The comments are usually - Well Done! What's next! so we forget them and continue to feel a failure or worthless!
We need to celebrate our successes more and congratulate ourselves & those around us when we do achieve any success. No matter how "small" a victory we think it may be, it is still more than many others have achieved.
So, if you are currently suffering with negative mental health for whatever reason, I want you to know that you don’t have to continue to suffer or struggle. Getting help to restore your positive mental health can be as simple as having a chat with someone who will just listen without judgement. This can be very useful in helping you to regain control and change your mindset. Often just talking about things that are bothering you are just minor issues that have got out of context and talking about them helps you get things back in perspective. This is the solution for many who have never suffered before until this virus arrived.
If the issues are related to deeper routed beliefs which have been created from past experiences, these too can be dealt with and the thinking and feelings around them can be changed relatively easily in a few weeks. Very often, when the issues are minor, you can help yourself by just following this process:
Start by asking yourself:
- What have I achieved in my life that I am proud of?
- When is the last time I spoke about that achievement with pride?
Keep working on this and learn to change the way you think about who you are and stop listening to those negative thoughts.
Remember how you felt when you accomplished your achievements.
What difference did these achievements make to your life?
Believe in YOURSELF and know that you are amazing!
If this works for you, then I am delighted to have helped but if you feel you need more then I invite you to contact me to start the conversation to begin your recovery.
Contact me if you would like to learn how to change your thinking - it could change your life!